Whether you're in business or a consumer, you can relate to the following statements:
- "We're not sure what's wrong with it. But it's going to cost you more to find out."
- Ring. "You've reached the emergency hot-line. We're not here, so leave a message."
- "Sure it's under warranty. We need the original packaging & paperwork from 1997."
- "We don't carry that item you saw in our newspaper ad this morning."
- "Yes, I realize we're three hours late, but at least we're here."
- "A complaint? You'll have to call the corporate office. No, I don't have that number."
- Ring. "You've reached the corporate office. We can't take your call right now."
- "That discount we advertised was for anyone over 110. You didn't read the fine print."
- "Are you sure it wasn't already broken when you bought it yesterday?"
- "It looks like your flight bag is over the 3 pound weight limit for carry-ons."
- "I'm afraid that the rebate was only for the Chinese version of Windows XP."
- "Yes, it's the express lane and you have one item, but it's a bunch of over 15 grapes."
- "The printer does not include the cable, electrical plug, or ink. Did you need those?"
- "I know it's 1 PM on Thanksgiving day, but we're out of turkey. Is spam okay?"
- "Yes, I realize we're three days late, but at least we're here."
If you happen to be in business and your employees or company has ever been on the sending end of one of these statements, then shame on you. Any business that provides a modicum of customer service should never subject us, the consumer, to such abuse. Reconsider your priorities and what a customer is worth. Negative word-of-mouth advertising is far worse than none at all. Try to teach your people the fine art of taking care of the consumer and do everything in your power to keep them. What have you got to lose? Just profits and success, if you fail to follow this advice.
Jeffrey Hauser was a sales consultant for the Bell System Yellow Pages for nearly 25 years. He graduated from Pratt Institute with a BFA in Advertising and has a Master's Degree in teaching. He had his own advertising agency in Scottsdale, Arizona and ran a consulting and design firm, ABC Advertising. He authored a book about his directory years, "Inside the Yellow Pages" which can be seen at his website, http://www.poweradbook.com and he is officially retired.
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